Where Is That Cowboy?

This is the only Cowboy I could find.  He’s the right one for me, but he isn’t the right one.

Cowboy didn’t say goodbye.  He didn’t leave a note in my mailbox.  He stopped visiting.  He stopped talking to me.  After a week, I started looking for him.  He isn’t here.  Anywhere.  Google says One Cowboy’s Way is a WordPress account that has been deleted.  I sit and stare at the words hard and sharp like iron. Friends do not delete themselves.  Do they?  I don’t know the way to the bunkhouse anymore.

I am worried.  My heart hurts a little.  I didn’t bother to know his name.  On purpose.  I liked to call him Cowboy.  We passed each other when we visited you.  He’d always been there before me.  Sometimes he left a note.  Sometimes he didn’t.  But he always left his card.  I still see his face.  The face of the only Cowboy I knew.  That weathered old cowboy face with the sweat-stained hat and the cigarette hanging between his lips.  I took him for granted.  Now he is gone.

We say we care.  We say it all the time to each other.  Do we?

Where is Cowboy?

20 Comments on “Where Is That Cowboy?

  1. One of my regular readers whose Blog was called Roger’s Place (on WordPress) just disappeared like that, deleting his Blog. He was a writer and lived in Florida. His wife occasionally contributed too. I think that he was my very first subscriber and always wrote encouraging comments. He and his wife travelled around the United States and he posted things about his travels on his blog. He invested in a laptop computer to help things along. Then, suddenly, nothing. He might have died. Someone deleted the Blog. Had it been his wife, I think that she would have mentioned something. Perhaps they both died and it was a family member who deleted the Blog. I did have an Email address for them but I didn’t like to write to it. I might have been intruding. Another of my regular readers seems to have disappeared too, but he has left his Blog. A more recent disappearance of one of my readers is because she is busy painting at the moment. Her husband bought her a lot of new colours for (or before) Christmas. Her Blog is still there. I’m sure that she’ll be back.

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    • I am an old social worker. We don’t worry about intruding. I would email Cowboy if I knew the address. I hope he is well. I like to think he just rode off into the mountains at daybreak one morning chasing after one of his Tom Fool notions.

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  2. I have been thinking about the psychological/emotional/spiritual impact of social media quite a bit recently.. It really hit hard after last week’s broohawha. We forget that the “digital world” can be very ephemeral. In this virtual reality can grow amazing relationships that expand our personal growth in so many ways. It certainly makes me appreciate and understand the “younger generations” who have grown up with this virtual world. If it has created such a huge impact on us “older folks, what has/is it doing to them ?
    Hope Cowboy is OK . I am missing a couple of regular bloggers, one announced heath issues & required a rest from blogging, the other just stopped posting. The blog is there with know activity. Then again my Media literacy blog has been in fallow state for sometime.
    Wonderful heartfelt post George. The image was very effective in emphasizing the emotional tug.

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  3. the friends who live inside my laptop are just as real to me as those i know in person. it’s odd when they go away – especially when they disappear without warning or explanation. hope he’s ok. hope you find him again. hope it was a blip. sometimes that happens…

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    • I know. I hope so too. I think he just rode off into the mountains with that old dog trailing along behind.

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  4. I have a terribly sad feeling, now, reading this. It’s stunning when someone disappears like that without leaving some sort of announcement or forwarding information. I had only discovered Cowboy through your blog, George, (as I have discovered other wonderful bloggers) and had only recently started reading his posts, but I know what a great source of support he was here. You (we) could always count on him to tell it straight, and, if you know what I mean, “to feel it straight.” He came across as someone genuine, and as you say, George, non-judgmental. There is one tiny possibility that he deleted that blog and plans to relaunch under a different and new name (some people like a new design and a fresh start sometimes). I have another blogger-friend who just this week was completely overwhelmed by THOUSANDS of spam messages in one day. But that may not be the case with Cowboy; he may have simply decided to move on. We’ll miss him, if that’s the case.

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  5. I know how you feel. There was a sweet person who disappeared from my list as well. She had an honest and kind voice, and a remarkable story. She never missed a post of mine and now she is gone. Honestly, I think of her every time I read my blogs…..

    elisa

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  6. I haven’t been following Cowboy for very long, but I enjoyed his posts. One could tell he cared about things, especially animals. Just today I realized that I had not seen any of his posts for maybe a week. If you find him, let us know he is ok. Friends check on friends.

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    • Yep, that’s what he would have said! Friends check on friends. So like his philosophy.

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    • Ana, when I started writing this blog, I saw this cartoon character “cowboy” Gravatar everywhere. So, I clicked on his name: “One Cowboy’s Way”. I loved the way he put his daily posts together. They appeared to be random happenings from all over. They were not. He always had a clear purpose. When I read his entire entry, I always saw what he was trying to tell us. There was no other blog like his. The way he structured it was unique. He let people take what they wanted and ignore the rest. He was always the first to encourage newcomers. And he kept at it. I did not know him, but I felt as if I did. He was just that way. I hope he comes back. You would like him. He was non-judgmental and kind. And he knew cowboying!

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      • I am sad to read this too dear George, I wish to meet with him too. But I will say again, you are SO BEAUTIFUL always and I love to read you… I hope and wish Cowboy comes back again… Thank you, with my love, nia

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  7. Wow…. That really does hurt when it happens, doesn’t it? I was surprised at the emotion I felt when a blog-friend disappeared a couple years ago…up and out of the blue. I did manage to find her email address somewhere, as we had communicated “off-blog” a couple times. She said she was scared that she had revealed too much about herself and her life on her blog…and just shut it down. Said she’d still write in her journal, but would be off-line. I thought about it for days…and still do occasionally. It creates a void somehow. Kind of sad. I’m sorry for you George. 😦

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    • Yes. You described it well. I was stunned. I thought I knew him, but I didn’t. He worked hard to put that blog together every day. Now, I wish I had paid more attention. Said more. Asked more. I know this is an anonymous place, but we are communicating with real people who feel like our friends. I hope nobody leaves here without posting a final goodbye. Tell us everything is okay or not.

      I don’t want to lose friends anymore.

      Thanks, Scott.

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  8. I have been wondering the exact same thing. He was such a supportive force as I was getting my blog up and running. And I miss his presence terribly. If you do happen to find out where he went… please let me know. I was kinda hoping he was just on vacation or some such.

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    • I know, Tracie, I thought the same thing for a few days. But, when I looked for him, the blog was deleted. I did not know him personally, but I felt as if I did. I hope he will come back. I’m certain a lot of people miss him.

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