Plan B

Jan-4-full-length-BW

Does this look like a dying woman to you?

Me either.

I just walked in from drinking iced coffee and smoking a cigarette

on my porch

where I’d been thinking about this blog.

My watch said 12:30 AM.

Jan-4-2015

(I threw this out-of-focus one in to frustrate your sense of composition)

I keep wanting to move the frame up!

Chuckle…

I am bored with all this talk of dying.

I thought the Crematory blog

would be funny to you.

It isn’t.

I love all of you who follow me.

I swear to answer every single generous comment that you’ve posted.

But,

hell, I knew you were kind and generous and supportive all along.

I’m dumping that Crematory thing along with the Hospice page.

I’m as fat and sassy and profane as ever.

When I change, I’ll let you know.

Meanwhile, if you’re as bored with this dying stuff

as I am, you’ll appreciate the reprieve!

πŸ™‚

Thanks, Guys!

Now, let’s all get on with living!

Chuckle…

67 Comments on “Plan B

  1. You look gorgeous. Death is possibly confounded by your attitude. Here’s hoping he leaves you well alone for a whole while longer πŸ™‚

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  2. You are looking in rude good health (as we say over here). I’m not sure where that use of the word ‘rude’ comes from but in this context it means ‘very good’. Glad to hear you’ve dropped the Crem page. Far too morbid to have that in mind.

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    • Thanks, Andy. As I always told my mother, “you’re going to have to start looking worse than you do if you expect to get any sympathy!’ Well, Andy, nurses, doctors, social workers…we all share a very morbid sense of humor! It’s a requirement to survive the job! I realized that only a handful of folks would understand the way it all seems to me. It isn’t that I’m not serious about it, but I just don’t take it seriously. We suffer most when we can’t laugh at ourselves and the ridiculousness of our circumstances. At any rate, I got bored with the whole idea when I didn’t fade away immediately. I’m impatient, you know. I’m either going like the Energizer Bunny or I’m dead asleep! Thank you, Andy. I appreciate your visits more than you know! πŸ™‚

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      • Great sentiments George and I have a quote for you (don’t know who wrote it), but I am sure your will Chuckle when you read it:
        ‘Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways – glass of Chardonnay in one hand, Strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, but screaming Woo Hoo – what a Ride!!!!’
        How about that then? Sounds apt doesn’t it!

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  3. I’d give a million bucks to look like the dying woman you say you are. I think you’re faking it. You look beautifully natural, full of piss and vinegar and I just want to throw my arms around you and say Happy New Year!

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    • Thanks, Linda! I love that old expression. Chuckle. The characteristic has always applied to me. I thought I was supposed to weaken and die, but hell, I didn’t, so I’m bored with it all. I bet I’ll whine to high heaven when I actually do get sick! My daughter said she couldn’t promise to be sympathetic when I start whining about some insignificant thing and ignoring the actual problem. She knows me pretty well. I hate mechanical failure and regard physical problems as the greatest annoyance imaginable. Thank goodness, I was never sick. I always knew no nursing home on the planet would keep me! I supervised them so I know. I’m their worst nightmare! A guy, who was twenty years younger than I, was my right-hand-man at the plant for many years, has mid-brain and cerebellar deterioration which affect his speech and coordination. We used to joke that we’d go to the nursing home together. He would crawl up and down the hall keeping the staff from beating the hell out of ME. He was a real charmer, but he knew I’d never make it without him! He is very disabled now, and I miss him. I’d love to have celebrated New Year’s giving you a big bear hug, too! Life is as funny as we think it is. And, I am always more amused than anything else about it. We are such wimps. The minute we threw off our fur coats and stood upright, we got to be whiners. Chuckle… Thanks for always making me feel good, Linda! πŸ™‚

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  4. Nope, you do not look like a person about to die! You look great! Of course we did not find it funny that you were dying though we appreciated your humor and clever blog title about the end. You are much too busy with life to focus on dying. May you continue to do well, George, and we will continue to appreciate your attitude. You have made us all relish life a little more. Cheers!

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    • Ah, thank you Jo Nell. You were the first person I met here through Sue, you know. I only recently met her face to face. But, I feel as if I’ve known both of you forever. She is going to take care of me in the end. How lucky am I? She’s a fantastic nurse, you know. She just took care of a friend from Louisiana who had major surgery here. She’s a jewel. I disagree with her politics vehemently, but I admire her generous soul and her skill and dedication to anything she does for people and animals alike. Sue is one of a kind. She can handle me. Not many folks could! And that’s the truth! I always admire your blog posts. So well-written and interesting always. Thank you for following along with me, Jo Nell. When will winter be OVER in South Texas? I’m tired of that too! πŸ™‚

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  5. A dying woman? No way…. Looks like a very happy and contented one… George you are looking good, and I’m glad you let us see what you look like… brilliant

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    • I’m as shameless as you are, Rob! We come from the same gene pool way back somewhere in prehistory, I think! πŸ™‚ We would have eaten well since we’re both fearless and big, strong animals. Chuckle.. I am a happy, contented old woman. You’re right. I’ve seen much of life lived “close to the bone”, death, dying, disability. Nothing frightens me. Life is what it is. I’m lucky to have lived so long and so well. I’m still a big, strong woman. I’ll wither on the vine one day, I’m certain, but I’m okay with that too. Life holds nothing to fear except fear. And fear will kill anybody. I have to get myself over to SA to see your new photos! I think about that every day while I wander aimlessly around trying to remember what the heck I’m supposed to be doing. Chuckle… Love you, Rob!

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      • George… the new camera is taking breath taking photos…still getting used to the settings and still a lot to learn but having a ton of fun doing it…

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  6. As Mark Twain said “The report of my death was an exaggeration”… which has since gone on to the famous quote, “the reports of my demise are greatly exaggerated.” Either way, a person should always have a Plan “B” in case Plan A goes awry. Apparently, living to die once you were told you were terminal, ain’t working out like you thought. Anyway, Plan B, ought to be your permanent plan. Just live and quit worrying about the dying part. Heck, that’s where me – and everyone who’s replied (above) are at. We’re all dying – it started the day we were born! chuckle…..

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    • Yeah, I loved that quote. It’s amazing how your death sentence never works out the way you think it will. Good grief! I’m tired of the whole idea. Fifty years ago, folks didn’t know they were “terminally ill”. They just got sick and died. Good idea. And, they died naturally at home. Better idea. And got taken care of by family and friends to the grave. We’ve lost that part of our lives, and it is sad. Thanks, Ray. You know I couldn’t do what I love without your help and talents. Not to mention your endless patience and generosity! πŸ™‚

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    • Hi, Robin! I’m either going or sleeping. I don’t think I have been bored once in my entire life. There is too much to do and to discover. I can assure you that I complain often and loudly in such mock heroic terms that nobody pays the slightest attention! I don’t sound serious, I guess. Ailments annoy me. Like mechanical failure of any kind. I refuse to accept the idea. One day, I’ll run out the clock, but I intend to keep going until she runs down. Chuckle… I am always curious about old people who complain of boredom. What’s the matter with these people? They’re sucking up precious oxygen. Just go in for some expensive test and look around at the old bored looking folks who are there! I hate to subscribe to the joke about rolling Granny off a cliff, but the thought does enter my head… Don’t tell anybody I said so, however. Chuckle… Strange society we live in. Thanks, Robin! I appreciate your visits, you know!

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    • You know you can use anything here that you want to use for whatever reason suits you, Ashley! Although, I cannot imagine why you’d want to use this one. Your blog is filled with the most fascinating characters and gorgeous self portraits I ever saw. It was such a creative idea and it has been highly successful. Congratulations! πŸ™‚ Thanks, Ashley!

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    • Oh, Ashley! When I saw the post, tears streamed down my face. And, I am a tough old bird who does not weep. The thought that you would post an ordinary snapshot of an old woman along with the work of such creative and talented artists is a statement of who you are. And to have read the comments of the guys, who have followed me although they are superbly talented artists who could spend their time following other artists, is touching beyond my ability to express it. Bless you, Ashley. Your kindness is overwhelming. I love all of you for it.

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      • Oh, George! I’m so pleased that it was a good experience for you. Your image fits my criteria just fine, thank you very much! Tsk!
        Feel free to engage with your commenters on your post of you wish.
        Thank you for your kind words, George, which in turn are very warming for me. Big hugs! x x

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    • Thanks, Patricia! I am easily bored with uninteresting projects, and this one is about as uninteresting as it gets! Chuckle… Thanks for stopping by. Maybe I can come up with something that interests me! πŸ™‚

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  7. LOL, we agree with Lyn: You are definitely one of the living-est folks around, and this post is evidence! Hello, 2015!!

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    • Hello, 2Geeks! I’m at least one of the complainest folks around. And loudly, too, by the way. The trick, I think, is to grin while you’re complaining to high heaven about whatever it is! When folks greet me with “How are you?”, sometimes, I pause for a second or two, give them my most elderly confused expression, and say, “Well, I don’t know, do you?” Gotta’ keep on amusing yourself to stay alive in this hellish place, I think! I am not as enamored with society as most folks seem to be… Chuckle… Thanks. You sound like a real person. πŸ˜‰

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  8. Glad to see the boredom hasn’t gotten you. You are the reminder of power of living. Stay strong & all the best. πŸ™‚

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    • I don’t understand the concept of boredom, Joseph. We’re here only a little time and I don’t have enough time left to do all the things I want to do and read all the books I want to read. When I think of how we all squander our time worrying about ourselves! Deano told me that worry was idiotic and a waste of time that could be spent on doing something positive. I think that’s the key to life. Forget what you can’t fix and get onto a project that you can do something about. I am having such fun with the dragons and the chameleons and the parrots and Che. Trying to read the books in my list. ETC. I hope you are well and the weather gives you a reprieve soon. I always think it’s winter there, for some reason! Thanks for stopping by, Joseph! πŸ™‚

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    • Thank you, Sarah. I don’t know how to stop living. I don’t understand the concepts of boredom or especially “rest”. I’m either going or asleep! Chuckle… I do enjoy my life, I have to admit, but I am not fearful of leaving it either. I smile a lot. Because I have a lot to smile about! Thanks for stopping by. As always!

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      • I totally get that George! I’m the same with my Crohn’s. Today is a hospital day but the upside is it’s in a beautiful part of London, right opposite the Houses of Parliament and Big Ben πŸ™‚ I smile and laugh a lot and it’s infectious!

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    • Hi, Blue Girl! I’m either dead asleep or going. I do not recall ever having been bored in my entire life. There is just too much to do, too many books to read, too many folks to talk to, too much to discover to ever run dry. I decided long ago that you really have to be willing to be mediocre. To admire folks who do whatever interests you better than you can ever do it. To do what you want to do without setting unrealistic expectations of yourself. I do whatever interests me fully aware that I am not going to do it as well as many other people are able to do it. That never bothers me. I am fascinated by people whose intellect and talents far exceed my own. That makes life exciting. You gotta’ be willing to play without concerning yourself with winning or losing. I play exactly as well as I want to play. I am not ambitious. I don’t have to know how to set my camera, for instance. I don’t care. I know exactly enough about how to use it to do what I want to do. Beyond that, I lose interest. I am a lazy person who dabbles. Chuckle… I love new ideas and new things. I’m curious about anything I see that appeals to me. And I am totally shameless. I think people are too afraid they’ll look foolish or stupid. who the hell cares? If I look stupid, I am causing the other person to feel a nice sense of competence and I’ll probably learn something from him! But, I babbler on. As usual. Thanks for always stopping to visit me, Blue Girl! πŸ™‚

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    • Thanks, Carissa! I loved your description of the curmudgeons and the Internet. I really chuckled about that one. πŸ™‚ And agreed wholeheartedly, of course!

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  9. One beautiful ALIVE lady… George, I was just thinking of you last night! Great minds think alike. πŸ™‚ Let us talk about living, words I am also taking to heart. Have a wonderful Sun day! xo

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    • I’m always thinking of taking on your Gravatar as my own, except that people already recognize my mugshot! Such a beauty you are. And you look the picture of youth and health. Yep, let’s talk about living. Illness is a boring pain-in-the-butt. An annoyance that is best ignored, I think. Of course, I complain often, loudly and in such mock heroic terms that nobody pays the slightest attention! Chuckle… You produce such beautiful work. Perhaps, beauty is born of suffering? I think so. Thanks for stopping by to visit, L’Adelaide. I think of you often too. πŸ™‚

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    • Thanks, Linda. You’d never have thought so at the ranch, huh? That little jaunt about killed me. As you said, I made a remarkable recovery the minute I walked in my own house door! Chuckle… I’m expecting you to come back soon! I love having you here, you know.

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    • Well, now Ute, remember that you said to tell you… When I post photos of all the animals, ad infinitum! Chuckle… I told my mother often when she was very old that she must smile since many old people look angry or hostile when they don’t smile. I have become my mother. If I don’t smile, Kelli asks what’s wrong with me. So I go around grinning like a monkey most of the time. πŸ™‚ Actually, smiling is natural for me. I love talking to people and just automatically smile. Often, I smile broadly at strangers who look grumpy. You’d be surprised at how many smile back. We go through life entirely too self-absorbed and worried. Thanks for always checking in, Ute Smile. I appreciate that! Your own wonderful smile did not escape me. πŸ˜‰

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    • Thanks, Sylvia. You certainly make the most of every day. I don’t think I’m acquainted with anybody who has as many exciting adventures as you do. Or who shares them and narrates them so very well. Have a great year yourself. I really do have to find out what you’ve been up to and what the agenda is for 2015! πŸ™‚ Thanks for always stopping by to visit me. It matters.

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    • Ha-ha! You know me pretty well. BTW, thanks for the intro to “The Joy of the Written Word”. I read several of Patricia’s reviews. I like her honest, unpretentious style. And her Book Shelf where I found Tolstoy’s “Letter to a Hindu” that I was unfamiliar with and downloaded it to read. You can make me laugh when few can, Tots! I look forward to that! πŸ˜‰ We come from the same kind of “spunk” folks, you know! πŸ˜‰

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      • If I can turn on your giggle box, I must be pretty good. πŸ™‚ Hey, I directed some folk over here to snoop around. They like you over here. Thinks your all that and a bag of popcorn. I agree.

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  10. Nothing immediate for me but in general decline health wise(I have this , that, and the other). I am so busy most days I don’t even think about it. Besides I can skip breakfast and lose weight because my handfull of pills fills me up. Father lives with me. He is 91. We are leaving Miami and bought house in North Carolina. We live a day at a time too and anticipate tommorrows as when we were young. Regards.

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    • This-that-and-the-other-thing rarely does anybody in, you know, but it sure serves its purpose. Complain often and loudly in such mock heroic terms that nobody pays attention. Keep grinning while you’re complaining. It’s much more fun that way. If somebody asks, “How are you?” Tell the bastard. It’s a great way to separate the folks worth knowing and not knowing. The “keepers” laugh. Or, look elderly and confused and say, “well… I don’t know, do you?” Makes life easier. I grew up in NC. Where you movin’ to? Hug your old man for me. He deserves it simply for persevering this long! Chuckle…

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  11. I like the pictures, my friend – and for once I’m not overlate in looking at them! Of course the lower one is out of focus but, looking at it one way, it does give you an attractive softness … And I absolutely LOVE “I’m as fat and sassy and profane as ever.” – there’s an alternative name for that description of yourself – its called REAL, and what you see is what you get, which is certainly the way to be.

    My thoughts about the Crematory and Hospice things are simply this – I thought them fine and, quite simply, its always good, enjotable and refreshing to hear from you, and whatever you put out I’ll follow and enjoy. Look after yourself, my friend, keep being you. Adrian xxx

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    • Coming from a guy who is shameless enough to call himself “Fatman”, that’s a compliment, indeed! I was always tall, lean and muscular, but Deano affectionately called me, “Fat Gal”. As in the old, rural southern US expression, “You don’t sweat much for a fat gal.” Only you would comment on the out-of-focus photo! Chuckle… You’re incorrigible, Adrian. I think that’s why I love you. You’re a real true follower if you read everything I put out there! Some of it horrifies even me later when I read it! Folks who like you come along and put up with you anyway. Trust me when I tell you that not everybody who knows me appreciates that “real” you’re talking about. πŸ˜‰ But, I’m a hermit and an eccentric and too old to care. Saying what you think is taboo in society, unfortunately. And, I have little patience for anything else. Thanks, Adrian!

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      • George, wonderful to hear from you! Two things to say. One, how I hate society’s taboos, sometimes they are almost enough to make me want to give up faith in everything! Knowing you helps me sustain that faith.

        Two, and maybe morbid a bit … for the time after your death, have you ensured that 1+ people have your WordPress user name and password where they won’t lose it, so that they – and especially Charlie – will be able to access your blog? Love from me! Adrian xxx

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  12. Now I know you are dying, you have told us that, but why are you dying, what have they said you have that you would die of it? I am being blunt, I think you are the type of person I can be blunt with. I don’t want to be morbid and I love the way you are dealing with it, it is wonderful and an inspiration to all of us.

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    • What we die “of” makes little difference. Dead is dead. Chuckle. I have Stage IV lung cancer. I was supposed to be half-dead by now, but it doesn’t seem to be working out quite that way. Illness isn’t very interesting to me. I got bored with the whole idea and decided it was high time to abandon that project! Thanks, Leanne!

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  13. Appreciate the opportunity to take a good look at you. And I like what I see. The doctors don’t know everything… nor do we. But I certainly agree with you on this; it’s good to live one day at a time… and to the full. Wishing you a very good day, and a very good year, George. I trust you’ll do it well.

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    • Thanks, Shimon. I’m just not interested in all that dying stuff since I don’t feel any differently than I did before the big diagnosis! One day, we’ll all croak, but I’m interested in what I’m doing now. The hospice nurses have to come once a week, but we laugh and talk about their work. I’m sure they’ll be unable to justify keeping me since I obviously don’t need them. I always lived one day at the time and I still do. I’ve never been bored for a day in my life, and I don’t know how to do it now. I keep collecting animals to take care of and to enjoy. Life goes on… With or without you and me! πŸ™‚

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    • Well, Sue, I stopped wearing makeup years ago and barely give my hair a lick or two with a brush. I didn’t do a thing to these photos except to crop and convert to B/W. I’m just not sick. I suppose I thought I was supposed to die right away. Now, I’m almost embarrassed that I didn’t! πŸ™‚ Thank you, Sue.

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